March 20, 2008

Motorcycle Mama

My wife just bought a Piaggio scooter, and although I’m thrilled that she now has a motorcycle endorsement on her driver's license and has joined the brotherhood of the two wheels, I can’t help but poke fun at her little, tiny bike.

It’s cute, and motorcycles aren’t supposed to be cute! So I kid her and call the scooter “The Hog.” She’s a good sport about it and says as long as I’m not calling HER a hog, she’ll let me live.

Of course she had to accessorize herself, and bought a specialty helmet made by Piaggio to match the color of her scooter. She also did some research online and bought a pair of jeans called “skid pants.” They look just like regular jeans, but they’re made to protect you if you hit the ground and slide for a long distance by incorporating a Kevlar lining. Yes, you read that right; she has bullet-proof pants. This will come in handy if she and the rest of her scooter gang decide to rumble.

I kid her, but I also applaud that she’s taken such a serious interest in learning to ride and being safe. I know that if she has an accident she’ll be well covered and will have a much better chance of survival.

I’m excited that she’s a bike rider now. She’s just not allowed to ride that little thing anywhere near me when I’m on my Kawasaki Vulcan. I don’t care if she gets 65 miles per gallon, I’m not getting laughed out of the Brotherhood after being seen next to that Tonka toy. Ha.

“God, wrap your loving arms around my wife as she braves the traffic and keep her safe! Amen.”

March 13, 2008

Drive it like you stole it!

I went by my office tonight to do something I didn’t get a chance to finish before I left for school this afternoon. It was dark and I just wanted to get home, so I took a chance on a yellow light that wasn’t having any of it, and turned pink. Ok it turned red. I quickly looked around and there were cars around, but it was too dark to see if any of them were cops. Until the flashing lights came on that is.

I was already entering a freeway and wasn’t sure if I should pull over right there. I decided to stop so as not to make the cop feel like I was running from them, so I began to move into the medium. Mistake number one. I heard a loud speaker come on and a voice say “DON’T STOP HERE! PULL OFF THE FREEWAY!”

Feeling like an idiot I continued to the next exit and pulled into a parking lot in front of a diner. After stopping I was once again unsure what to do. So I got out of the truck. Mistake number two. The loud speaker once again blared “Get back in your vehicle sir!” Could I possibly do more to tick off this cop?

I sat in my truck with visions of county lock up running through my mind when the officer came up and took my driver’s license and insurance. Nervousness took over and my mouth fell into gear. I made excuses for running the light and that I was sorry and that I had a good driving record and that I was really, really sorry and that I never do that kind of stuff and that I was really, really, really sorry.

She took my license, asked me to wait, and went back to her squad car. I sat in my truck, suddenly feeling like I was 5 years old sitting in my room after doing something wrong and being told to go there to wait for my spanking. Would she run my license and see that I have a perfect record and just tell me to be more careful, or would she come back with a ticket in her hand?

I sat stewing in my truck and started to get frustrated with myself for being stupid and at the cop for not showing any leniency. After all, I have a clean record. I’m sure she sees that on her little screen in her car. She doesn’t have to give me a ticket, why was she taking so long? I don’t deserve this, it’s her fault for being a mean person! She should have taken one look at my driving record and came up here to give me a medal, not at ticket! I’ll show her, when she comes back I’m going to make a really digging smart aleck remark about not showing a little grace to people. Why not? She’s already giving me a ticket anyway, so why not give her a good verbal jab!

She arrived a minute later with citation in hand, but before I could say anything she looked at me and said “This isn’t a ticket, it’s just a warning. You don’t have to go to court, and it won’t go on your driving record. It’s just to say I had contact with you. That’s a really dangerous intersection you went through and a lot of people have been hurt by people running that light.”

Hear that whistle blowing? That’s the Shame Train leaving the station, and I’m the conductor. Woo Woo.

I thanked her for giving me a break, and apologized for running the light, and we parted.

God teaches. In more ways than we can imagine. In the span of a few minutes He taught me a lifetime about grace, respect, humbleness, taking responsibility, and just plain shutting up. Yes, God teaches. It’s too bad He has to resort to such extreme lessons to make us get it.

March 12, 2008

Forgiveness Grammar

Sometimes life throws things at us that can really disrupt our lives. A lot of times these events are produced by other people. I recently counseled someone who was having a problem forgiving another person for issues they caused in their life. This other person wasn’t showing any remorse, so she didn’t see why she should forgive them.

I told her that she was looking at it backwards. Forgiveness isn’t just for the other person, it was for her too.

Forgiveness is listed in the dictionary as a noun. In fact, forgiveness is also a verb. It’s an action you can take regardless of what the other person deserves. Why? Because when you forgive someone, I mean truly forgive someone, you remove the animosity in your heart created by the other person’s actions. It opens the door for letting the wounds heal and the possibility of rebuilding that relationship.

Sure, it would be nice for the other person to be sorry and apologize, but that may never happen. Sometimes ego and stubbornness get in the way. So why wait for them to do something? Why carry around that hurt and animosity? Take action yourself! Once the other person sees that your actions aren’t tied to theirs, they may feel a lot differently about apologizing.

You don’t have to wait for someone to be sorry to forgive them. Jesus didn’t. He didn’t just show up one day and say “all is forgiven.” He epitomized what an act of forgiveness is. He took action. A big, bold, hanging on the cross, action. He didn’t wait for us to be contrite, and He didn’t wait for an apology.

You can’t control what other people do, you can only control what you do, and forgiving someone regardless of their remorsefulness will change how you feel about the whole situation.

“Jesus, I am not worthy of your forgiveness, but yet you gave it to me anyway. Thanks for your unconditional love, and for the example you set for us all. Amen.”